We have been taught through school and especially in business today a set of actions to take when ever something goes wrong. The first step in this learned response is to affix blame. Often this leads to self reproach. We blame ourselves or we look for a scapegoat.
These actions dwell on the negative qualities of the situation. Often this is done so quickly that we have not even taken the time to find out what happened. Take the case of a salesperson who hears that the order he has been expecting for five units came in but that the order was not for five units. Instead of finding out what was ordered the salesperson starts to look for whom to blame. The order was for ten units. Commendation was in order not blame.
At 3M Corporation there was a scientist that was trying to develop an adhesive that would not dry out as quickly. The adhesive was a failure. It stayed moist but it did not hold tight. The scientist did not greet it as a failure. Instead Post-It notes were born.
Every situation has a lesson to teach us. Do not blame anyone, not even yourself for a situation. Make an upsetting situation become a learning experience. Each “negative” experience is an opportunity to create something better.
Be flexible like the tall grass that bends with the wind. Don’t get defensive, blaming others and becoming stiff. The inflexible dry limbs are the one you find broken and laying in the road after a wind storm. The grass that is well root and bends is greener and stronger after the same storm.
You cannot change the past. We don not know what is in the future. The present is what we need to merge with and become one with the present moment. Each moment is a gift. Experience the Spirit in everything that lives. Release your fears, resentments, hurts, and troubled feelings. Become lighthearted, happy and peaceful.
We are kayakers. We have been on some wild rivers and have never been injured. When kayaking on the Nanana River in Alaska, we hit rapids with standing waves that were eight feet high. There is a secret to running rivers or experiencing nature. Do not fight what is natural. Experience life as it flows from nature. Become open to all points of view. Remember when things don not go your way there is a reason. Often it is better to go with the flow.
Look at your problems as opportunities. They are challenges for you to overcome. They are learning experiences. One of the definitions of insanity is repeating an action and expecting a different outcome. In other word, if you, when you are in a situation, you react the way you did before you should expect to get the same reaction. Grabbing the hot rack in your oven will give you a burn. Next time you use an oven glove. We learn from our errors. We get better.
Participate, get involved and work together. When you remain open to the possibilities you can experience magic, mystery and adventure. Learning how things work does not make them any less of a miracle. Did you know that there is only one substance on Earth that gets less dense when it goes from a liquid to a solid? That is water. When it becomes ice it floats on top. If it sank to the bottom, there would be no life on Earth. Knowing the way the crystal form does not make this any less of a miracle.
Each of us should discover our true self. We are mental, emotional, spiritually and physically beings. We all have a purpose in life and we must find it. Find your talent that is unique. Find out how you can use your unique talents to help this world, serve humanity with it. Enjoy the gifts that others have received and give. Much pain and suffering come, not from a lack of talent, but from begrudging others their talents. The musician that must play every instrument and every part gets no jobs. The band that respects and enhances each other becomes well known.
If we are caring, loving and sharing we can create joy and happiness for each other. As we travel on our journey we give love, appreciation, affection, etc. These should be given freely. If they are given as a price, we will always be short changed in the response. It is often said that you can not buy love. Giving love only to get love does not work.
Life is like a puzzle where, the past, present and future interlock. You will never solve this infinite puzzle until you let go of fear and hatred. When you let go the pieces fit together, millions of separate pieces to the journey of experiences. Alone we are together with all. Look for the patterns. What things are always the same, could they be different? Do you care how others view you? What is important to you? What expectations do you have?
Healing comes from learning and growing. We have known too many people who have been divorced many time, or who move from one dysfunctional relationship to another in endless succession. In most cases we see the similarities in each of the partners that these people choose. They only see the differences. They do not learn the lessons. Meditate on life. Remember each of us has a purpose. Ask for guidance. Do not follow anyone. Learn from them. The true guru, healer or teacher knows that each of us must walk our own path. We all have different pasts. Healing comes from moving forward. As it is said, you can never go back. From second to second you are different. Each year 90% of the atoms in your body are exchanged. Accept the possibilities. Learn, heal and grow.